{"id":2685,"date":"2018-05-17T10:04:30","date_gmt":"2018-05-17T10:04:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.spotlight.com\/?p=2685"},"modified":"2026-03-23T09:14:45","modified_gmt":"2026-03-23T09:14:45","slug":"how-to-feel-fulfilled","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.spotlight.com\/news-and-advice\/lifestyle-wellbeing\/how-to-feel-fulfilled\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Feel Fulfilled"},"content":{"rendered":"

Fulfilment explored with Bea Grist<\/h2>\n

As part of our series on\u00a0mental health<\/span><\/a>\u00a0this Mental Health Awareness Week, here is our Mental Health and Wellbeing Manager Bea Grist on the importance of fulfilment, and how we can get to the heart of this feeling with clarity.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

As I sit down to write this article, I realise that\u00a0we are approaching the Summer Solstice. I am reminded that everything in nature happens without effort: the seasons, new life, growth, dying away. Nature doesn\u2019t have to think about when it is time to let go in autumn or bud and blossom in spring. However, whilst nature recognises that change is the only constant, humans often need a tremendous amount of courage and commitment to do the same.<\/p>\n

What is fulfilment?<\/h3>\n

Think about your own life for a moment. What is your vision of a really fulfilling life? What would that be like? Whatever answer comes to mind, notice that the question takes you deeper than simply asking,\u00a0\u201cWhat do you want?\u201d\u00a0This greater depth is one of the reasons why fulfilment is such a key element of living a happy life.<\/p>\n

As a Co-Active coach, my job is to support clients to make changes in their lives. Clients rarely come to me specifically saying that they want a more fulfilling life. I\u2019m more likely to hear,\u00a0\u201cI want higher-paid work, more interesting opportunities, more holidays, a better work\/life balance\u2026\u201d\u00a0We spend much of our lives looking at what we have\u00a0–\u00a0and what we don\u2019t have – and then looking for something to fill the gap. Something that might satisfy our hunger for fulfilment.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf only I had a better agent\u2026if only my face was more symmetrical\u2026if only casting directors didn\u2019t always call in the same people\u2026if only the director would let me do it my way\u2026\u201d\u00a0Sound familiar? And yet, when we have these things, the satisfaction or fulfilment is often momentary.<\/p>\n

Being versus having<\/h3>\n

Think about something you really wanted to have. Focus on that moment of elation when you acquired it and then how quickly the glow began to fade. As long as we continue to look for ways to\u00a0have\u00a0a fulfilling life we are likely to be temporarily filled and yearning for more.<\/p>\n

In Co-Active coaching, we look at fulfilment through a different lens. We ask clients what would it take to\u00a0be\u00a0fulfilled? It\u2019s a subtle difference but it unlocks enormous possibility. One of the easiest and simplest ways to put this into practice is to turn the clock back to the last time you felt fully alive. A time when your spine, arms and fingertips were tingling with excitement, a time when you didn\u2019t care what anyone thought of you. And now ask yourself: where were you? What were you doing? Who was with you? What was your impact on them? When we connect to this aliveness, we feel a sense of wholeness and satisfaction, as well as a feeling of rightness and harmony. It is an experience of being complete.<\/p>\n

Values<\/h3>\n

Values play a key part in guiding us along the decision path of our lives. Honouring our values (i.e. what is most important to us) is inherently fulfilling, even when it is hard. For example, if loyalty is one of your values, you may find there are times when you suffer discomfort because a director with whom you had been nurturing a relationship doesn\u2019t call you in for an audition. However, once the discomfort has passed, a sense of integrity and congruency with that value will remain.<\/p>\n

When our values are not honoured we feel internal tension or dissonance. We are very good at being flexible and resilient, but there is always a price to pay for doing what we feel we\u2019re expected to do rather than putting our own values into practice. So the next time you are in a situation that has a strong impact (positive or negative) on you, start to look at how your values show up and ask yourself: what values do I sometimes neglect? Which are the values I will not compromise?\u00a0And, what is the price I will pay for not honouring that value?<\/p>\n

Fulfilment changes over time<\/h3>\n

Fulfilment is fluid and evolving. What you found fulfilling at twenty-one is unlikely to be fulfilling at forty-five. You may have been driven to find the perfect creative opportunities in lieu of financial stability, but now more money would lead to honouring values such as fun, adventure and peace of mind. Even though fulfilment changes over time, it is always possible for you to live a fulfilling life today, right where you are, even as you are making plans to transform and evolve.<\/p>\n

Honouring who we are can mean making tough choices. However, I believe that fulfilment is worth the challenge. I know that people want to say they went after their dreams and they fulfilled their purpose in their own unique way. To quote the brilliant Bren\u00e9\u00a0Brown:\u00a0\u201cHowever afraid we are of change, the question that we must ultimately answer is this: what\u2019s the greater risk? Letting go of what people think or letting go of how I feel, what I believe, and who I am?\u201d<\/p>\n

Bea Grist\u00a0is Spotlight’s Mental Health and Wellbeing Manager and a Life and Wellness Coach. She trained with CTI (Co-active Training Institute) and offers one-to-one coaching to support you in bringing more clarity to your life. Prior to becoming a coach, Bea marketed Nottingham\u2019s and then London\u2019s theatre and arts scenes for thirteen years, working with such companies as New Perspectives, Nottingham Playhouse, Almeida Theatre, National Theatre, and Ambassadors Theatre Group. She is passionate about supporting and empowering performers to thrive.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Fulfilment explored with Bea Grist As part of our series on\u00a0mental health\u00a0this Mental Health Awareness Week, here is our Mental Health and Wellbeing Manager Bea Grist on the importance of fulfilment, and how we can get to the heart of this feeling with clarity. As I sit down to write this article, I realise that\u00a0we […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2706,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[45],"tags":[132,48,53],"class_list":["post-2685","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle-wellbeing","tag-bea-grist","tag-mental-health","tag-spotlight-experts"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nHow to Feel Fulfilled | Spotlight<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Discover how to find lasting fulfilment in your acting career by aligning with your values and focusing on "being" rather than "having."\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" 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